so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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