I cockslap morals
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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