What a fucking waste of an outfit
oh god the rape fog is back!
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
