You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Blood and glitter go together right?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
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