I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
