some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
A+ Viking dick
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
