Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Screwed.edu
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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