yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
