You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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