i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
