HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Randomize
