Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize