Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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