I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
