You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
