You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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