I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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