so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
