Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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