Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Dicks are not precious.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize