It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
