The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
