I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
