Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize