No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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