just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
