remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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