i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
