We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
True strength comes from lack of pants
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
