i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
