Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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