The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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