Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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