no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
this must be what syphilis tastes like
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
