we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Mom said you looked used
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
