I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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