I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Acid is not a monday night drug
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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