My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
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