i jhust puked up my retainher.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
