2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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