Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
