I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
