I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize