My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
