Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
