dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Randomize
