Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
