I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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