We should be called the Road Head Warriors
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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