why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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