lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
