ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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