I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
